Wednesday, February 13, 2019

{coffe date no. 8 | comparison is the thief of joy}

Well hey my friends...

It's been a while since a coffee date! In all honesty, I haven't felt like writing. I will give a more in depth Coffee Date in March but there's just been a lot going on. I also couldn't really get words out that weren't a hot mess of emotions ha. I've been focusing on just me this past month and a half. That meant prioritizing my workouts, planning dinners with friends, and most nights just cooking at home and watching Netflix.

I've had some tough days this year (yes, I know it's mid-February) where I wasn't sure if the plan for my future was going to happen. If everything I'd worked for was going to fall apart and I'd be left picking up the pieces all over again. I've prayed about it and decided that I'm just going to have faith.

In all of this darkness I realized that what was constantly bringing me down was comparison. "She gets to travel all the time." "She just got an amazing collaboration." "She has her boyfriend going to parties with her." "She looks amazing in that dress." "She is so skinny!" You get the picture... instead of focusing on the joys in my life and what I've worked hard on I was comparing my norm to someone's highlight reel. That doesn't sound fair right? On the other side of my phone someone could have been saying the exact same thing about me!

Comparison is the thief of joy.

Think about that... I mean really think about it. When you compare yourself to someone else - what does it do? Does it make you work harder? Maybe. Does it make you feel good about yourself? Rarely. Does it make you dislike that person? Probably.

Comparing myself to others made me feel inadequate and like I wasn't good enough. I couldn't measure up to all of the great things those other influencers were doing. If I tried to imitate them it didn't come across as genuine and I felt like a cheat or copy cat.

I had a nice sit down with myself and dished out a huge dose of reality... I work a full-time job. So of course I can't travel every week and shoot during the day and write all of my posts in the early afternoon. That means half my nights I dedicate to this blog - that's a sacrifice I'm willing to make because I love it. It's absolutely freezing in DC so I'm not going to be shooting bikini photos!! But there are other ways to shoot Spring content and get excited for warm weather. Kyle is military and that means there are certain sacrifices that have to be made. Being with him is the best thing that's ever happened to me so I choose his lifestyle every day - I couldn't be prouder of the job he does. Some people have a natural thigh gap and some don't. Guess what - I will never have a thigh gap haha I feel ridiculous that I actually wanted that. I work hard in the gym and on my nutrition every day. I've documented my own results so what the heck, Jenn?! I work with an incredible group of ladies at The Confidence Co and they support me no matter what.

You know what my solution is? Focus on what I am good at. I'm not going to compare myself anymore. It's not healthy to try to do everything and what everyone else is doing. Instead, I came up with three different ideas and began executing them. I'm a creative individual so why can't I pave my own path!! Will I lose followers over it? Probably. Do I care? Heck no!

Workout Calendar // I created these in November/December when I couldn't find one that I aesthetically liked. I decided to create an original hashtag (#workoutwithjennrog) so that I could track my fitness posts and then I shared it with you all! It's been amazing to see everyone jump on board and stay committed to a healthy lifestyle!! That only inspired me even more to begin doing giveaways for y'all - little ones since this is on my own dime :) [side note: you will never see me do a loop giveaway. I believe that that's cheating and buying followers] It's helped me stay accountable and it's created a really fun network of individuals cheering each other on! Check out my story highlight called "templates" or "giveaway" to see what I'm talking about!

Pantone Color Series // I described this a bit in my first IG post but I work with color every day as an interior designer. It's what inspires me, excites me, and grabs my attention! So many of my outfits are pulled together with color in mind. I actually work with matching Pantone colors to fabrics a lot... the idea came to me one day when I was pulling a blue and my shirt matched the blue perfectly! I wanted to bring my inspiration to Instagram and share it with y'all and it just makes me so happy that it was well received!! It's not all linking new outfits and accessorizing in my life ;) Color is at the root of what makes me @jennrog!

Outfit Videos // I have always wanted to try my hand at videos!! One morning, while I was taking the bus to work and stuck in horrible traffic, I was playing around on my phone and accidentally reversed an entire video. I looooved the outcome!! I did a teaser a couple of weeks ago and finally shared a full reverse outfit video last weekend! Seems y'all loved it too since everyone was trying to figure out how I did it haha. So now I'm going to make that my new "thing" - backwards videos that make it seem like accessories are flying towards me! It's fun, unique, and I haven't seen anyone doing it yet lol.



Go back to your roots and where it all started...
Find what inspires you.
Find what motivates you.
Find that thing that makes you smile.
Create your own joy *take that Mari Kondo*

If you're still reading - thanks for sticking around! I'd love any input from y'all or thoughts about comparison. It's a hard trap that I think anyone can fall into when you're down and things aren't going your way. But life is all about how you pick yourself back up and keep on keeping on... Hoping to update y'all more about what exactly has been going on in my life next month ;)

Love Always,

1 comment:

  1. Love this Jenn! I've been loving all of your content lately. Totally relate to the comparison thing- in the past year I've found so much happiness in being single in this stage of life, and it's all due to a change in my mindset!

    Have a great rest of the week!

    xoxo A
    www.southernbelleintraining.com

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